Christian novels are a source of inspiration and encouragement for people like me, who often seek new ways to live out their daily Christian lives. Throughout high school, I read books on pirates, restoring love, redeeming love, forgiveness, second chances and on many adventures that Christian men and women experienced. Through these different adventures, they experienced God’s presence, love, forgiveness and grace. Of course these were a lot of fiction books, but the biographies demonstrated God’s presence, wisdom, grace, love, protection and his patience with us.

I wished with all my heart I could live my life like the characters in both the fiction and autobiographies. Their relationships with God and those around them inspired me to define myself and lifestyle in Christ without focusing on what people would think. They taught me that my relationship with God and individual people was personal and I shouldn’t relate with people based on how my neighbor related with them.

One of such books, which I reread recently was titled “Redeeming Love” by Francine Rivers. She lays before us two characters who are from two backrounds and yet God’s grace abounds in both of them. Angel the female character, expects nothing from men but betrayal. Sold into prostitution as a child, she survives by keeping her hatred alive towards the men who used her, leaving her empty and dead inside. However, God tells Michael Hosea to marry her, making the entire book of Hosea come to life. Michael is a man after God’s heart, and he marries angel and loves her unconditionally, constantly battling Angel’s fury and rage towards men.

With the passage of time, she sees his unrelenting love for her through his actions, his gentle encouragements and his unending love even after she runs away several times and he still forgives her. Gradually, his unrelenting love begins to tear down her walls and she takes off once again, because she felt unworthy of his love. According to her, he needed someone who had not been soiled in her life. She didn’t deserve him. On her way to make it on her own, her past caught up with her, creating a decisive moment of truth.

Once again in front of lustful men, waiting for her to sing the well-known entertaining songs to arouse the crowd’s appetite, she sang “Rock of Ages”. Silencing them with her new found lyrics, she stared down at them, asking them why they were not at home with their wives and families. In that instant, Angel knew she no longer belonged to such a place.  Following a small silent voice she had heard a few times, she walked off the stage ready for whatever punishment her owner had. Ready for those burning angry eyes, she faced an uncertain fearful man who was unsure of the new woman before him. Before he could do anything to her, her angel came in and asked if she was ready to leave. She said yes, but would need time to collect the children.

When she walked onto the stage with the children, the men went wild with rage to know that child prostitution was also practiced. Her long life enemy was nowhere in sight nor the man who had guarded her. They had fled.

Well Angel met with her maker and understood where Michael Hosea got his unrelenting heart to love her from. His voice was kind, warm, assuring and gentle. All her life, Angel had felt neglected, unworthy, unloved and blamed herself for ever being born. At that moment, she realized that none of what happened in her life was ever her fault.

She dedicated her life to helping women like her find their way in life. As a bonus, she went back to Michel after three years to find his arms wide open to receive her. Now that is REDEEMING LOVE. How many of us suffer with guilt? God’s love is unconditional. It does not keep a record of all the wrongs we have done, nor it counts us unworthy of him. If that was the case, he would not have sent his son to come down and shed his blood, so that we might be cleansed from our sins. He calls us out of the dirt and cleanses us with his REDEEMING LOVE.

REPORT FROM OBSERVING STUDENTS (pdf)

STUDENT OBSERVATION REPORT

INTRODUCTION

Working with young people is hard and demanding no matter how skilled you are with them. Young people all come from different backgrounds with different upbringings and cannot necessarily be categorized as one. Due to their different backgrounds, ironically, they bring out the worse in you as well as the best. Sometimes, they push you to the edge, drawing you into a battle field. Assessing and observing the students’ needs for a student counsellor, has been a challenge in itself. Students have constantly challenged the teacher’s authority, by disrupting the class, eating, sleeping, singing, pretending to be sick and making commentary remarks. They have explicitly display their dislike for the English language, both in verbal and bodily language. It is easy to say that a student is lazy in the classroom or that they are sleeping in the classroom and not doing their work. However, what is actually going on in their minds and why would they choose sleep over paying attention in class? Being an actor in the field of education as well as an observer has provided great understanding in knowing the students’ needs in the past few months.

This report draws attention to three main sections. If first directs attention to the students’ internal struggles; followed by the consequences of their internal struggles and finally, recommending helpful mechanisms that can be used to help these students to strife academically and socially.

STUDENT’S INTERNAL STRUGGLES

Some students can be present in class, yet absent. Sometimes it can result from lack of understanding of the lesson or they might just be struggling with a situation. Unless they are questioned, they would not volunteer any information and we adults often seal the deal as laziness, disrespectful or dullness. It is through one on one conversations that one gets to understand the student’s state of mind. In so doing, one might come across depression, anxiety, self-esteem, stress, perfectionism, sleep, peer pressure and even eating disorders.

Through different activities in the classrooms and numerous conversations with students, as well as the conversations they have amongst themselves, it is possible to assume that many students do struggle a lot with peer pressure (self-identity). Other signs drawn from their attitudes in class have demonstrated that some might be struggling with low self-esteem. Furthermore, they might be struggling with stress, which can emanate from the need to be heard. Many students might have unresolved circumstances, which they struggle with and these can lead to unfathomable actions.

peer pressure

After observing students in the classrooms for six months, it is safe to say that some of these students are struggling with their self-identity. They are struggling with who they are and what they want. Peer pressure occurs when one person has to choose between what they want and what will please their friends. They are faced with the dilemma of peer satisfaction and self-satisfaction, thus drawing themselves into an internal conflict. Through class lessons and discussions, especially in the examination classes, some young men have acknowledged that most of their choices are as a result of peer pressure. When directly challenged to change, they admit the difficulties. Their friends will look at them differently and call them names. Thus they wager between being “the black sheep” or following the majority.

Low self esteem

Low self-esteem is experienced when one feels negativity towards themselves, judging who they are and not really able to see one’s value and worth. This can stem from rooted negative beliefs (LSE Student Counselling Service, 2015) from the adults in their lives, be it parents, teachers, or relatives. It can also result from one’s background and their status in society.  In year three, students were asked to share with each other what their parents’ occupations were. From the exercise, it was revealed that most of them were from dysfunctional homes with single parents, and some were embarrassed because of their parents’ occupations. Whenever a discussion in class touches on their parents, they react very strongly. They reaction in anger or build an attitude, which often hides their fears and embarrassment. How can this be confronted? What measures are in place to help these students deal with who they are?

Stress:

Sometimes it is hard to draw the line between stress and depression. Yet, a person who is stress, is often responding to events that may make them feel threatened. To deal with this, some people can develop an energetic attitude, which helps them reduce the situation’s effect on them or it can produce a totally opposite effect. A lot of stress can lead to headaches, panic attacks, stomach aches, dizziness, exhaustion, low motivation and poor concentration. With students, it is not easy to pinpoint exactly what is wrong with them, because they have used the same excuse many times in class that the adults overrule it as lies. Some complain so much about headaches, stomach-aches and exhaustion.  However, when students open up and speak about their home situations, you can see the stress points in their lives. These stress points can lead to a variety of feelings, such as anxiety, low self-esteem and depression.

Depression

Depression can thus lead to a student’s isolation and avoidance. Isolation enables them to pull apart from their parents and groups, because they do not want to bring others down or have their feelings affect them. They might feel worthless and believe others don’t care about them. Others tend to avoid their circumstances, especially when they are too difficult and overwhelming to engage with.

Conversations with some students revealed that they live with parents or step-parents who do not understand their feelings and they try to make life unbearable for them. Others stated that they live with relatives who consider them as no bodies. These young people are treated no less than street children, hence they build a defence mechanism. Through the pain and maltreatment from the adults in their lives, they classify all other adults under the same category. One student openly confessed that at home, she does not speak much nor express herself about what is going on. So she cries alone and the only comfort she has is her friends when she comes to school. Hence in school, she takes up the opportunity to speak and express herself. The challenge right now is to help them know when to express themselves, and not during lessons.

Students device different mechanisms to deal with the events in their lives. Sometimes a student maybe sleeping in class, there’s no explanation, thus we assume they do not want to be in the class and lack interest for the class. However, they might be struggling internally and to them, sleep becomes the better option. During a lesson, a young man was sleeping in class. When he was touched to wake up, he got so angry and told the teacher never to touch him. The teacher was quite irritated by this. He had no right to talk to a teacher in that manner nor to sleep in class. His next words however, made the teacher guilty. He said “you don’t know what is going on at home, so don’t talk to me like you know me”. The teacher realized that the student might be struggling. The teacher scheduled a meeting with him and when they finally met, he apologized for his actions in class. However, he was not ready to explain what was going on. What becomes of these feelings stored up inside?

CONSEQUENCES OF INTERNAL STRUGGLES

Not knowing what to do with their feelings and the situations in their lives, students device their defensive mechanisms by grouping with those who will listen to them and see things from their viewpoints.  Thus, they discharge their loads on their peers, especially when the adults in their lives are not listening. In as much as this sounds comforting, it has a downside. Once these groups encounter a conflict, they spew up some of the loads, which their friends had off loaded, resulting in a huge discriminative scandal.

Discrimination among students

Peers are a good place to feel comfortable and at ease, yet, they are also a place of destruction each depending on their goals. Students have little skills in dealing with conflict, which brings about their destruction and that of their peers. This conclusion stems from a number of incidents witnessed between students.

One of the major incidents was from one of the senior classes. On a Wednesday afternoon in April 2016, a group of young ladies gathered in the Senior Discipline Master’s office over a disagreement. Painful words were exchanged, and secrets were revealed in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Students use each other’s backgrounds and experiences to create enmity and look down on one another. In an exchange of insults, comments such as “Look at you who have aborted many times” “Look at you who has a baby”, “Your father abandoned you, because you were worthless”, “Look at you who has had a baby with your brother and he abandoned you.  Are you not ashamed?” “I am not like you who has slept with many boys around here”. “You cannot compare yourself with me. I am twenty-one years old and still a virgin, and you?” The list of statements is endless.

Such words do bring trauma to the individuals who have had bad experiences and are trying to ameliorate their way of life. Many tears were shed on that day. At the end, they were asked to bring their parents the next morning. The next morning, they were cleaning the different corridors. The question we should ask is whether cleaning helped to resolve the matter? When they are through with their punishment, will it change the way they see their friends and take away the discriminative statements? How can they deal with conflict in a more dignified manner?

Fear of torment

Students have a lot to say, but to whom will they confided in? Who is there to listen and make a difference in their lives? Furthermore, why are they so afraid to speak about their circumstances? Going back to the young man who offered no further information on what was going on at home, we can focus his silence on the culture they have grown up in. The African cultures have taught us not to share our internal torments with members outside of the family homes. This is truly a good value, for it preserves the family secrets. However, this also produces silent abuse. Students complain about the home situation, but will not accept any intervention.

They are afraid to speak out in fear of being treated worse than before. In their own way, they withdraw from the family setting and hide in their rooms or find comfort in friends. Some prefer to eat outside with friends than to eat at home, where their worth is not appreciated. When asked if they would like a visit to their home for observation, they say no, because they would not want to be beaten afterwards. They would rather play the good/bad child, than to be blamed for bringing trouble on the family. In as much as this demonstrate loyalty, it grieves the victim of abuse. It prevents students from getting the help they need, and promotes “silent abuse”, which nurses their anger towards the people around them.

When they do grow up, they become monsters, meaning they develop strong hatred for anyone who tries to minimize them or take advantage of them or insults them. some of their attitudes in class are reflected in some adults we converse with on a daily basis. It will not be surprising to find them fighting on the road, trying to defend their honour. Is violence however the only way to settle conflict?

Although, some have no such defence mechanisms, they look to you as an ideal adult in their life who cares. This is reflected in their written essays, as they pour their hearts and minds. Though they may not speak, they listen to the advice that teachers pour out through their lessons in class. Some do have loving parents, but the company they keep coax them to be rebellious. What can be done to help these young people?

RECOMMENDATIONS

Students try to blend in with everyone else, dissuading themselves that their load is not that heavy. How can we ease their loads? How can we turn their negative energies into positive energy? In many homes, students do not know what love is all about, and have no idea how to demonstrate it. Violence, which does not have to be physical, is their constant meal, because insults are hurled at them and they digest all of them without reciprocating. At the end, they build up anger which can never be broken through force or words of wisdom. Therefore, what can be done to revoke what has already been rooted in them?

Workshops

Many people lack what we call a people’s skill, which means a good way of communicating with others without the use of force. Hence this report would suggest that the school should designate a day every month, to hold a workshop within the school, to help the students in their self-development process by focusing on different themes. These themes could centre around; Conflict resolution, Friendships, Families, Confidentiality, Self-esteem (stress and depression), Anger management, Leadership and forgiveness.

Conflict resolution: focuses on different methods of approaching a disagreement, such that both parties are able to listen to one another without feeling accused.

Friendships: focuses on building lasting relationships with friends

Families: focuses on settling disagreement in families without favouritism

Confidentiality: focuses on understanding feelings and being able to keep secrets no matter how painful the person has hurt you.

Self-esteem: focuses on roots of self-esteem and how to develop positive self-esteem

Anger management: focuses on dealing with anger and turning negative energy into positive energy

Forgiveness: focuses on helping people forgive through love, although we might feel justified in our anger.

Student Counsellor

This report also recommends that an expert who understands the various needs of students should be available to help the students go through various experiences and still retain their self-worth. A student counsellor plays a key role in any of the educational institutions and their job does not involve directly with teaching, but giving advices and providing guidance to the students about their personal or academic life. A student counsellor often helps the students to deal with the pressures of life and is also responsible for monitoring the overall psychological growth of the students. Counsellors identify problems, such as alcohol and substance abuse, family violence or problems between students. In response, they use a variety of counselling methods and conflict resolution skills to resolve these problems.

Counsellors also help students find their appropriate educational path and help them stick to it. A student counsellor’s responsibilities according to St. John, The School of Counsellor, 2011, include:

• Guiding the students regarding their career decisions and helping them understand their potential and providing help to pursue their goals.
• Helping the students understand their skill sets and provide ways to utilize them
• Providing information about the various universities and professional enterprises and advising them about various requirements
• Advising the students on their personal problems and helps them to resolve them
• Engaging the parents and the school authorities, for coming up with a solution, if the child faces some big problem and together they help the child.
• Recognizing the behavioural issues and provides solutions to handle them.
• Holding various sessions with the students to identify the problems, that the child faces and try to understand their troubles and advise them.
• Working as a mediator between the student and the college authorities, if there is an argument and tries to resolve it.
• Implementing and delivering early intervention and community education programs in consultation with the Heads of school.

A student counsellor, provides counselling and a support service for students, as well as support the Students and teaching staff to meet the social and emotional needs of students by providing advice for individual learning plans. They participate in Crisis management planning when such situations arise, and there have been a number of cases at CEBER. Thus they provide a confidential counselling service for students, their parents and staff as per the institutions’ principles.

Although the above recommendations are rich, they are certainly not easy to accomplish. Not everyone will be enthusiastic about opening up to a stranger. Thus, it requires a lot of support from the administration, teaching staff and parents. It will need full cooperation from all the adults in the students’ lives to help form them as great men and women of tomorrow. These two methods focus on self-development and mentality change, which is one of the key reasons why social science has become mandatory in the country. To make Citizenship more practical, we need to help the young people with their self-development by attacking the root causes of their problems.

REFERENCES

LSE Student Counselling Service (2015). Self Help Resources.

St. John (2011). School Counsellor. Role Description.

Ms. Diangha Goodness

Master in African Peace and Conflict Studies

Je me sens pour la première fois unie avec les femmes en cette journée internationale des femmes, pour la seule raison que je connais mes droits et je peux me faire entendre. Mais, que signifie cette occasion pour les femmes ? Est-ce comme la St. Valentin, où les hommes doivent leur offrir des fleurs ; ou une journée pour manger et boire comme certains hommes et femmes au Cameroun en pensent ? Mais, que signifie « La Journée Internationale des femmes » ?

Histoire Brève

Le 8 mars est attribué à une manifestation d’ouvrières américaines du textile en 1857, où les femmes réclamèrent le droit de vote, de meilleures conditions de travail et l’égalité entre les hommes et les femmes.  Au fils des ans, des femmes dans plusieurs pays du monde ont adopté ce mouvement pour l’égalité. À Copenhague (Danemark) en 1910, à la  conférence internationale des femmes socialistes, Clara Zetkin, a proposé pour la première fois, que « les femmes socialistes de tous les pays organisent tous les ans une journée des femmes qui servira en premier lieu à la lutte pour le droit de vote de femmes » En 1921, en Russie, alors un pays communiste, Lénine décrète le 8 Mars comme journée internationale des femmes en souvenir des ouvrières de St. Pétersbourg. La Charte de Nations Unies de 1945 a été le premier instrument international à affirmer le principe de l’égalité entres les femmes et les hommes. Puis en 1977, l’Assemblée Générale des Nations Unies demande la création des conditions favorables à la limitation de la discrimination à l’égard des femmes et à leur pleine participation, sur un pied d’égalité au développement social (résolution 32/142).

Donc que veux-dire « un pied d’égalité au développement ? La Résolution 32/142, conjure tous les Etats à proclamer l’égalité au développement comme il conviendra en fonction de leurs traditions et coutumes historiques et nationales ». Comment pouvions-nous tenir cet objectif, considérant que dans plusieurs pays, les traditions, et coutumes sont les défis qui empêchent l’avancement de l’égalité ? Celles-ci interdisent aux femmes de conduire, d’avoir une éducation, de se marier avec la personne de leur choix, d’être propriétaires et d’hériter de la propriété de leur mari.  De plus, certaines coutumes traitent les femmes comme des propriétés.  Alors, comment pouvions-nous leur faire ressentir cette Journée Internationale des Femmes ?

En France, le 8 Mars 1982, le président François Mitterrand demande que cette journée serve à glorifier et rappeler l’importance du rôle des femmes dans la société Française, et plusieurs pays peuvent adopter cette attitude. Que faire pour développer l’égalité ? Que peuvent-elles faire pour changer les traditions et les coutumes ?

Les femmes doivent comprendre la signification de cette journée. La journée internationale des femmes est un jour où les femmes sont reconnues pour leurs réalisations, sans égard aux divisions, qu’elles soient nationales, ethniques, culturelles, économiques ou politiques. Donc, c’est une occasion de faire le point sur les luttes et les réalisations passées, et surtout, de préparer l’avenir et les opportunités qui attendent les futures générations de femmes (Nations Unies).

« Mon mantra dans la vie est de ne pas dédaigner les débuts les plus humble » par Leymah Gbowee. Dans sa vie, elle a souffert d’avoir été une femme pendant la guerre ; d’être mise en couple trop jeune alors qu’elle désirait aller à l’université. Elle eu un compagnon violent et des grossesses non désirées. Par conséquent, elle s’est retrouvée tour à tour dans l’alcoolisme et la dépression. Mais elle a vaincu tout cela en prenant la décision de quitter son compagnon, de continuer ses études, de participer aux différentes conférences pour résoudre les conflits et jusqu’à présent, elle conduit les femmes sur des chemins de paix. En 2001 au Libéria, elle avait déclaré qu’ « on ne peut négocier une paix durable sans inclure les femmes dans le processus ». Mais les femmes ne peuvent devenir des artisans de paix sans se libérer des douleurs qui les empêchent de prouver leurs propres forcesSon histoire est incroyable. En 2006 fut célébré le 5^eanniversaire du vote de la résolution 1325, qui appelle à intégrer davantage de femmes dans les programmes concernant la paix et la sécurité, et demandant que les pays prennent des mesures particulières pour protéger les femmes et leurs filles de la violence masculine.

Pourquoi Leymah Gbowee ?

Leymah Gbowee est une inspiration pour les femmes Africaines, et aussi autour du monde. Sa ténacité, malgré les mauvais traitements et les défis, montre aux femmes dans les différents pays, qu’en dépit des traditions ou des coutumes, elles doivent se surpasser et se faire entendre. À sa manière, Leymah a guidé les femmes ver le bon chemin pour récupérer leurs propres forces et a montré aux femmes, qu’elles peuvent changer des circonstances dans leur vie.

Donc, durant la journée internationale des femmes, les femmes sont appelées à organiser un repas entre femmes dans les quartiers ; ou avec des copines ; ou réunisse les femmes de la famille et tiennent des discours sur un thème désigné internationalement. Elles doivent dire non au travail domestique et lutter pour un partage équitable des tâches ménagères. De plus, elles peuvent soutenir les associations de terrain qui aident les femmes victimes de violences.

Le 8 Mars à mon à vie c’est une occasion pour féliciter toutes les femmes, comme ma grand-mère, qui aide les familles sans poser de questions. Elle est l’avocate de l’éducation pour des jeunes filles qui ont à devenir des femmes pour le développement de leur société. Et je suis la preuve de ses efforts. Le 8 Mars et aussi une occasion de soutenir et de lutter pour les droits dans nos coutumes. Alors, messieurs, ne confondez pas cette journée avec la Saint Valentin. N’offrez pas de fleurs aux femmes, mais rejoignez les dans la lutte pour l’égalité entre femmes et hommes.

What does your national anthem mean? This week really brought out the patriotic part of me for this motherland, Cameroon.

O Cameroon, Thou Cradle of our Fathers,

Holy Shrine where in our midst they now repose,

Their tears and blood and sweat thy soil did water,

On their hills and valleys once their tillage rose.

Dear Fatherland, they worth no tongue can tell!

How can we ever pay thy due?

Thy welfare we will win in toil and love and peace,

Will be to thy name ever true!

Chorus

Land of Promise, land of Glory!

Thou, of life and joy, our only store!

Thine be honour, thine devotion,

And deep endearment, for evermore.

From Shari, from where the Mungo meanders

From along the banks of lowly Boumba Stream,

Muster thy sons in union close around thee,

Mighty as the Buea Mountain be their team,

Instil in them the love of gentle ways,

Regret for errors of the past,

Foster, for mother Africa, a loyalty

That true shall remain to the last.

“Instil in them the love of gentle ways”, is one of my favorite lines in this national anthem. It calls out to all Cameroonians to be gentle with one another. Being able to gently nudge our young people towards resolving conflicts in a peaceful manner enables us to play a part in this national anthem. This is a synopsis of how we celebrated our 50th ANNIVERSARY OF THE NATIONAL YOUTH DAY CEBER. The students demonstrated their love for the Cameroon music, through their dance performances. The poems and sketches were stimulating and encouraging to the youths.

In CEBER

Working with children and young people is hard and demanding no matter how skilled you are with them. Children and young people all come from different backgrounds with different upbringings and cannot necessarily be categorized as one. Due to their different backgrounds, ironically, they bring out the worse in you as well as the best. Sometimes, they push you to the edge, drawing you into a battle field. Teaching in the last five and half months in College Technique le Bon Berger (CEBER), has been both a rewarding experience and a challenging one.  One of the challenges faced was with indiscipline students disrespecting authority. Secondly, lack of materials made it hard for students to participate. In addition, discipline masters and the administration were a great obstacle in carrying out their duties. Other teachers as well, had no respect for one’s time, thus they would hold students in class and continue with their lessons. It is not a laughing matter, when class begins and it is well into 20 minutes that you find students walking into your class, or you have to go and look for them.

Measures to combat challenges

Assigning seats: This keeps control of the class, because students are separated from friends who often time, influence them to converse in class. Although, most teachers outside of Africa would agree that this should have been done from the beginning of class, it would be better to view things from the context we found ourselves in. Assigning seats is considered a lot of work for most teachers and the administration.Therefore, it is often left to the teachers to direct their classes as they see fit. I went into teaching with a clueless mind as to what to do with notorious students, especially, when there are no clear defined rules and regulations for discipline. Thus, I have been pushed to adopt certain methods not exercised in CEBER. To the students and staff, this is a foreign method, yet has proven effective, because the most notorious class has been sobered through this measure. They sit in their seats when they walk into class, with the knowledge that if they move from their seats, they would be sent out of the class and marked absent. To this, they are less inclined to speak with their friends and discuss unrelated subjects in class. It sounds like dictatorship, but the notion here is not whether they are prisoners or not, but whether they are grasping the concepts and being able to practice them in their daily life. Learning without practical use is meaningless.

Keeping notes on indiscipline students: Normally, a student gets three warnings from the teacher concerning their comportment in class. They are often asked to see the teacher after class, where they are counselled. If they continue with the same conduct, then their names go into a form from the administration, which would result into the summoning of their parents. One of such meetings will take place on 20^th February 2016, where students will be summoned with their parents to discuss their conducts in school. So far, some of the notorious students have relented.

Group work: Group work has been effective combating the lack of teaching materials. Summarizing the lesson into a group activity enables students to have access to the work before them. They can thus discuss the work while reading the words over and over, and being able to ask questions because they can see the paper. To accomplish this, I constantly, type up the lessons into a page and photocopy the page for the students. Learning a language improves when a person can see before them and relate to what the teacher is talking about, rather than just listening to words go into one ear and out the other.

Oral conversations: The students have three hours of class every week. They have two hours one day and one hour another day. To improve and boost their esteem in oral conversation, I have decided to use the one hour as a practical class for them. Together they will converse and not be scared of what others would think.

Staff General Meeting: Concerning the challenges with authority and staff, the Principal addressed these issues in the staff general meeting. He also highlighted that there would be consequences for not fulfilling one’s duties and responsibilities in the appropriate way. This was a constructivestep both to the administration and the school as a whole, because not only do they seek to improve the students, but also the employees as well.

These measures have improved the class situation tremendously, and has encouraged not just me, but the students as well. When they see me outside of class, they try to converse in English. Gradually, they are asking questions in class and demanding for worksheets which are meant to increase their understanding skills. Thus, I have been urged to respond to their needs once again with more enthusiasm.

Other observations

The need to be heard: In the past two months, I have also had the opportunity to talk with students and just listen to their home situations. My hypothesis from the first part of Being a Teacher, was further proven to be true to a certain extend. Students live with relatives who consider them as no bodies. These young people are treated no less than street children, hence they build a defence mechanism. Through the pain and maltreatment from the adults in their lives, they classify all other adults under the same category. I have been able to loosen my high held opinion of their conduct.Although, some have no such defence mechanisms, they look to you as an ideal adult in their life who cares. This is reflected in their written essays, as they pour their hearts and minds. Some do have loving parents, but the company they keep coax them to act out. Others on the other hand, are plain spoilt brats that need serious discipline. They believe they can say anything and get away with it because they parents are wealthy. Well, that can be done in any other class, but mine.

Earlier in the new semester, a student was sleeping in my class. When I touched him to wake him up, he got so angry and told me never to touch him. I was quite irritated by this, because he has no right to talk to a teacher like that nor to sleep in class. His next words made me guilty, for he said “you don’t know what is going on at home, so don’t talk to me like you know me”. True, that I don’t know what goes on at home, but as a student, he still had no right to talk to me like that. I told him to get out of my class. However, the next class, I told him, I would like to speak with him. So far, I have not seen him since that class. They need to be heard.

In addition, some of these students don’t speak at home, so when they are in school, they use the opportunity to speak and express themselves. The challenge right now is to help them know when to express themselves, and not during lessons.

Fear of torment: These students are afraid to speak out in fear of being treated worse than before. In their own way, they withdraw from the family setting and hide in their rooms or find comfort in friends. Some prefer to eat outside with friends than eat at home, where their worth is not appreciated. When asked if they would like a visit to their home for observation, they say no, because they would not want to be beaten afterwards. They would rather play the good/bad child, than to be blamed for bringing trouble on the family. It is really painful to listen to their pain. When they see you, they are so happy. Sometimes a hug is all that they need to brighten their day or to have someone who loves and cares for them.

In all, I am learning a lot about teaching, reaching out to the students and praying for them even when I am exhausted from screaming at them. Seeing their smiles and teasing when I walk into class always warms my heart and boosts my energy.

2015, gave me the love and care I had waited to experience with my family.  I was able to show them the love and care I held in my heart for them, by spending time with them

DO NOT WORRY ABOUT TOMORROW
THE UNCERTAINTIES OF TOMORROW 

Graduated from the University of Bradford on 5th December 2014, I faced many uncertainties as I looked to the year 2015. How will I deal with leaving the friends I have made in my time in England? Will I find a job? What would my life be like? What would my friends and family think of me after all these years of schooling and nothing to show? Moreover, how will I explain to them that the man I had been in a relationship with ended it a broadly without an explanation?   These were essential questions, which had no answers at the beginning of the year 2015. These questions did not stop me from knowing God was in control. The first sermon of the year on January 4, focused on reflection of one’s heart and forgiveness of wrongs done to you in 2014. The simple task was for us to write down all the wrongs done in 2014, and lay them before God. When the task finished, I walked home a different person. When the door closed behind me, tears of pain flowed, as I sought to know what I had done wrong in my relationship, which ended 10 months earlier. I had thought I had forgiven him, but it turned out on that Sunday that I had not truly faced my fears. Once I gave that to God, he opened my eyes in a new way.

BLESSINGS
HE IS IN CONTROL

He set me free and beside me was a wonderful gentle man who had been a true friend and had wiped my tears on many occasions and listened patiently while I complained. He became one of the first blessings of the year for me. We both confronted our feelings for each other within the few days I had left in England.  Both of us had promised to let the other know how we felt, before we separated and none of us had knowledge of this solemn promise. To confirm God’s leading hand, I visited his parents in France over the summer and we are now waiting to welcome him in my motherland.
On this last day of the year 2015, I just want to thank God for taking away my tears.

Back in Cameroon and so much to do concerning work, I tutored at RFIS for 4 months and gained some teaching experience. Who would have known that God had been preparing me to be a teacher for a while? After my summer vacation, I got a part-time job as an English teacher with College Technique le Bon Berger. God was in control of this year, wiping away my worries of finding a job. I am now looking for a full time job.

Do not worry about tomorrow, for God is in control of it. Your blessings might not come the way you expect them.

I want to thank God for WhatsApp. It has maintained so many of my relationships with friends and kept us in contact. I give glory to the special offer Nextel has for WhatsApp, where I only pay 500 cfa for 7 days unlimited WhatsApp internet. It is a wonderful blessing.

I praise God for good health for my family members in Cameroon, Switzerland, and Kenya and around the world. He has been keen to our distance and has not laid stress on us to attempt to make trips beyond our means. I now look forward to 2016 with an open mind knowing God does not change

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 280 times in 2015. If it were a cable car, it would take about 5 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

At 1 a.m in the morning of the 23^rd December 2015, my mom, sisters and I exchanged our feelings of my stepfather, who would be buried the next day. As I listened to them talk about him, I wondered if there had been something I missed out. This man was kind, loving, and caring. He had been there when my mother needed someone to pay her bills and to give her shelter. To this, I share everyone’s sentiments, and appreciate his kind gesture and love to take us in when my own father rejected us. Yet why am I so defiant towards the thought of owning him as my father?

Sometimes, we seem so sure of something or someone so much that we are convinced that they will never change. Yet life has a way of disappointing us in unexpected ways. When I received the news that my stepfather was dead, I was emotionless. I was void of feelings, until hours later when it hit me that my stepfather was dead. That is when the turmoil inside began. For so long, I thought I knew the man whose name I carry. My memory of the past tells a story of a man, who did not care whether I was fed or not. He seemed to care less whether I was hurting or not and above all, whether I went to school or not. “What do you want money for? Women are trained to cook, raise children and take care of the house. Go and ask your mother for money.” At the age of 9, I felt like my world was collapsing over 1,500 cfa, which was my school fees in class 1 or grade 1. That is when I concluded that this man did not care for me. For many years, I held unto that thought.

As we, four women talked and listened to each other’s feelings, we realized that there was a lot of regret for the better part. My mother saw a man who cared for her and fought against unseen forces that controlled him, thus leading him to neglect those he cared for. As an eyewitness, she testifies to his last few years, where they demonstrated his total control of his mind; revealing the man, he was truly inside. In his last few years, he sought to re-establish the relationship he once had with his children and grandchildren. He was sorry for the things he had done and not done. He had been a difficult man to live with, but he accepted the responsibility for children he did not create. He had taken care of them in his own level and been a man who desired to be good. My mother thus concluded that much of what he did was out of ignorance and at that moment, I truly felt sorry for her and the husband she had lost. My two sisters felt guilty for not reaching out to him sooner. They felt they had neglected him and only reached out to him when it was too late.

What about me? I do acknowledge and respect the fact that he paid my mother’s bride price back and the price on all her children’s head. Like I mentioned earlier, I felt lost in my emotions, as I wondered what my family would think of me. I did not want them to think of me as ungrateful. Yet I could not just fake feelings and accept him as my father. However, I felt guilty that I never knew him and I wished I had given him a chance to know me for the woman I am today. I felt out of place for not being able to claim him as my father. Before I left home, I was shy, timid and a loner. I always felt out of place and found it hard to belong. While sitting with my family and speaking about my stepfather, I felt like a total stranger to them. It has been about sixteen years, which I grew up outside of my own home and tradition. I have been exposed to so many different cultures, which have shaped and built the person I am, and it would be difficult to break away from that knowledge.

Yet, in all of this turmoil, I found something else. I found forgiveness towards the man I thought I knew and acceptance of the man I never knew. If he could live a few more years, I would take the chance to see past the hard man I thought I knew; to the man everyone seemed to know. In all, I was grateful that my heavenly father was there to take care of everything and execute his will in our moment of confusion.

Teachers receive little recognition than they deserve. How many people desire to head to a class of 48 girls, who are rude, impolite and VERY disrespectful and sometimes you find yourself almost at fistfights with them? How many would want to head to a class of 61 students with only 4 girls, and these young men are almost your age and taller than you? Alternatively, how many would want to head to a job without training or orientation, yet are expected to meet all obligations? There are higher figures than stated above, yet there’s a need to pass on knowledge.

Based on the brochure I received with information on the school, I was made to understand that College Technique le Bon Berger (CEBER) worked with street children, orphans, prostitutes, unemployed youths, underprivileged children and others who had dropped out of school. Before we commence on being a teacher, it is good to highlight that I went to CEBER seeking to be a Guidance Counsellor for the students, as well as networking with other partners to help these children get the best out of our social system. Well, that didn’t go as planned. I was asked to teach the students and observe them at the same time. Easier said than done.

Teaching in CEBER is a continuous rewarding experience as well as challenging. It has been a privilege to teach English as a Second Language to Francophone kids. This has enhanced creativity skills, reinforced anger management, boosted management skills and strengthened character development, such as developing a heart of humility towards the students and some authoritative figures.

Challenges

It has been hard teaching Francophone young men and women, who demonstrate their dislike for something very explicitly in verbal, body and facial language. In addition, they speak their native language in class and making comic remarks, thus disrupting the class. This clearly marks their disrespect for the teacher, lack of home upbringing and impoliteness towards their peers. In terms of discipline, they refuse to do what you ask them, and when you send them outside, they begin arguing with you. If you touch them, the others would start chanting “fight, fight, fight”. These are 11-16 year olds.

With such attitudes, one begins to wonder if education is really what some of these children need. This made my neutrality off balance, because as a teacher, I have to administer discipline and as an observer, I am not. The two roles in themselves are constantly conflicting with each other, creating a great gap.

Lack of teaching materials has been another obstacle in teaching these young men and women. Students do not have textbooks, no dictionaries in the library, thus you cannot use the textbook provided. It doesn’t help either, when they do not have the bases in English, yet you are expected to cover the heavy laid out syllabus.

In the past few months, discipline masters have been another challenge towards my authority as a teacher. One halted in the second month, but one persistently carried out his duties during lessons, which undermined my authority as a teacher, thus enabling the students to disregard my authority in the classroom.

It has been hard coming to class sometimes and finding two students, and only to be told that they rest have been asked to clean the chapel. To make matters worse, the other half of the class constantly shows up late for class, because their last period teacher didn’t let them out. At the end of the day, one has to go collecting students all over the campus and by the time class begins, it is 30 minutes or 45 minutes into the period and you have only an hour left to teach. When confronted as to why students constantly come late to class, the teacher says she didn’t hear the bell ring. Do you as a teacher have to depend on the bell or constantly check your watch to make sure you are not going over time? How many power outs do we have in Yaoundé? Does one really have to remind you that there is no electricity?

Observations and responses

The students

Many International Laws have classified the lack of education as one of the factors that enables children to join armed forces. Every country is thus encouraged to focus on the children’s lack of education during rehabilitation and reintegration. “7.78 Educational activities should take into account the children’s lost educational opportunities, their age and stage of development, their experiences with armed forces or armed groups and the potential to promote psychosocial well-being, including a sense of self-worth. Children with disability should be included in educational activities with their peers” (The Paris Principles, 2007)

The past few months suggested that we might be channelling our focus in a wrong direction. Children have been skipping classes, even with the teacher in the class. They would come in, wait for the attendance to be read, and would slip out of the classroom while their friends hand their bags to them through the window. Furthermore, where does one draw the discipline line, especially when certain students purposefully cause havoc in class to be sent out? Some take permission to go out and never return. Students refuse to study for exams, even with the teacher’s efforts to incorporate their theory with action. So far, group work has been introduced in many of the classes, which is meant to help the students interact with their peers who are at the same level in the language. However, some of these students take the opportunity to sleep, which is reflected in their grades at the end of every sequence. They love getting points, but they hate working for those points. Thus, they have realized that group work actually an important part of their studies. In the second sequence, many students in the higher classes got the concept of group work and actually came up with the English words that they had within them. This was very encouraging.

There are some students who appreciate being in a school to study, and there are others who feel like they are forced to study. Being an actor in the field of education as well as an observer does not take long to understand the student’s needs in the cities. Many students have parents who struggle to provide for their needs, but they take it for granted. What is thus missing since they have everything, yet refuse to take education seriously? What is the right action towards these children?

It is easy to say that a child is lazy in the classroom or that they are sleeping in the classroom and not doing their work. After three months of teaching, it is safe to say that these children are struggling with who they are. This is not new, but one cannot generalize all the students without first observing them from their contextual setting. In one of the chaotic lessons with the girls, it was revealed that most of them are from dysfunctional homes with single parents, and some are embarrassed because of their parents’ occupations. Thus, they react in anger or build an attitude, which hides their fears and embarrassment. How can this be confronted? What measures are in place to help these children deal with who they are?

Resources

In terms resources, it has been easier to let the students use the vocabulary they had acquired, to discuss in their groups and teach the lesson. Letting them discuss the question in their groups and crosscheck it with the teacher’s notes has made the class more interactive than asking the students to read in their textbooks, which they do not have. Using pictures as well has been a great way to catch their attention. It had enabled them to describe what they see and finally figured out what the topic for the day is, just by taking a good look at their own descriptions of what they saw. Presentation charts will be used as soon as they are made available. Handouts have been very successful, as they are able to see pictures and construct sentences in the grammar tense being focused on for the day.

Discipline masters

Students have had the habit of coming late for classes and blaming their tardiness on the discipline masters. After observing them for three months and also the Discipline Masters, the matter was taken to the Senior Discipline Master. He thus explained that students are not allowed in classes if they are late, unless they show a Billet D’entrée. Concerning the Discipline Masters, they have no right to enter classes and carry out their duties unless the teacher permits them. No person is supposed to interrupt classes for what so ever reason. The teacher in the classroom has authority over that class. Students are not to leave class until the lesson is over.

Rewards

The Cameroon system measures the students’ good performances through their test results. Cheating is a word well known, and it would be fair to request for a change in the system. Students’ will not study hard, but would expect to pass exams through other’s hard work. A number of students were not too happy with zeros in their second sequence exams, because they used distractions as a means to cheat off each other. It was rewarding after the exams however, when a student refused to look at his marks on 20. When asked why, he was very honest and said the marks were not his to claim. Someone helped him in the exams. Now what am I to do with such an honest student? Why did he decide to reveal that little detail?

Simply because after the scripts had been marked, it was surprising to see that almost the whole class had above average. That should be a good thing right? WRONG. From their class performances, one would expect about 10 students to have an above average. On the contrary, about 4 students had below average out of 38. In class, they were made to understand that cheating would not take them anywhere. If they had cheated during the exams, then it would be shameful for them to rejoice over their score, especially when they know they do not deserve it. Hard work actually enables one to be proud of their work. From that little speech, he came up and spoke the truth, appreciated the speech and he promised to work hard and do his best.

A few days ago some students revealed their desire for someone whom they can confide in. They have faced betrayal of trust in their friends and family members and there hasn’t been no one person in whom they could open up to. This confirmed once more the main purpose and goal as to why I had wanted to work with these students. They are hurting and need someone who can listen as well as meet with their family members, when they are ready to face the problems. It is an emotional journey, and they need a light they can follow.

Although very challenging, getting to know the students and desiring to help them improve in the English language has created a deep affection for them. If sleepless nights are what it takes to get one student to make a choice not to cheat but to work hard, then I shall do my best as their teacher to help him achieve his goals as a bilingual student. Being a teacher is not easy, but is a passion that develops with time, thus making every obstacle a great weapon.

Another encouraging reward has been the Pedagogic: Capacity Building workshop training we undertook in November. It coincided with the basic knowledge of transforming student’s knowledge into action, which is one of the objectives of Human resource departments. The focus was on developing creative and innovative students, rather than pumping them with theory. The teachers were encouraged to device activities, which created opportunities for students to be creative. For teachers to achieve that, they themselves were encouraged to be spontaneous, innovative and open-minded.

“Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togethew today. Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam within a dweam. And wove, twue wove, wiww fowwow you fowevah and evah… So tweasuwe youw wove” says the impressive Clergyman from The Princess Bride.

A beautiful event which God blessed with much laughter and rejoicing. Alfred and Lovette

As true as it can be, I was blessed and honoured to attend my uncle Alfred’s wedding on Saturday 21^st November 2015. It was truly a blessing to partake in this happy moment of  his life, as he took Lovette (a beautiful name I must say) to be his truly wedded wife. Wink.

The Impressive Clergyman above has said all there is to be said. It was truly a blessed awwangement (arrangement), for many voices echoed this long after the wedding was over. They could not cease to praise the event, for it was peaceful and well organized. People felt included, appreciated and valued. People ate, danced (I did dance) and enjoyed a cheerful atmosphere.

God truly blessed their wedding and I was grateful to partake for my own selfish reasons. Hehehe. I was able to see my mom and my siblings and other family members whom I have not seen in years. So it was also a time to reunite with family, re-establish certain relationships and forgive where forgiveness had been denied in the past. A truly blessed opportunity to kill many birds with one stone (sorry for animal rights activists).

On a serious note, I was happy to receive a new addition in our family and to see a wonderful smile on my young uncle’s face. Lovette is a beautiful woman and I truly wish the best for the new couple in town. May the Lord God lead them and may they start looking alike soon.

Like the Impressive Clergy man, I would like to say, “Tweasure youw wove” and let no one else determine how you should run your household. May what you have between the two of you, be so strong that no drilling machine can pierce through it.

My beautiful mother (stood as a witness) and my beautiful older sister who made both my outfit and hers, and helped with the cooking. I was the family photographer.